Yee haw!!! I'm so excited! I just checked out the results of yesterday's half marathon, and I have to share this. I stinkin' placed 2nd in my age group! It wasn't a PR. I was three seconds shy of that, which I'd set back in June. (I think it was the presence of my Mighty Man at that one that spurred me on.) :) But it was still a great race! Clocked in at 1:35:20. Not too bad! Thanks so much to the awesome Prairie Fire Wichita Marathon organizers for putting on such a great event. I love this race! :)
And a HUGE HUGE high five to my girl, AMac who set a new PR in the full marathon. 3:46:46, baby! Way to go, lady!! :) She's a stud. My little marathon mama. :) Hugs, friend! :) Love you!!
So, after the big race yesterday, I was blessed with a day of rest this morning, which was such a blessing. With the time, I was able to spend an extended amount of time in the Presence of the Lord this morning. And, oh, how I needed that. He really, really blessed me.
Last Sunday, the Mighty Man started a new initiative at church called "The Bridge," in which the congregation would come together an hour before service, divide into small groups and begin studying different subjects. I'm SO blessed because our group is going through the 5 Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman. This is going to be awesome! :) I'm so excited to learn how to give and receive love based on how God created both me and the Mighty Man, and to apply it to family and friends, too! And huge thanks for Mr. and Mrs. P for leading. You guys are great!
One of the things that we talked about in the first session was how full our love tanks were. Man, that is a great question to ask the people who are closest to you. "How full is your love tank and what can I do to help fill it?" That really makes you think! I've asked MM that, and I've also asked my family. It's really interesting to hear the answers they give based on how they give/receive love. Like last night, I asked my PPB, and he said, "Just give me lots of hugs." :) No problem! I can do that. :) Now, if I asked MM that, it might be to offer verbal affirmation or just to sit with him for a while based on how he gives and receives love. It's totally awesome! And it's such a testament to Psalm 139 and how God created each of us uniquely and specifically. It really makes me appreciate the specific and wonderful design of those in my life.
The MM and I, as part of our homework for the class, took a survey from the book to discover our individual love languages. While my man is actually tri-lingual (way to go, babe!), I had a clear frontrunner: quality time. That's apparantly the biggest way that I receive and give love. Totally not surprising to me. But what WAS surprising was how little I actually employ this love language when it comes to the primary relationship in my life: the one with God.
This morning, as I was able to spend an extended time in His presence, the first thing that came to my mind was how incredible it was just to be with Him. No agenda. No rush. Just be with Him. Just sit with Him. Just let Him pour into me. Just let the conversation go where it would. I rarely do this. Oh, but how I need it.
It became so clear to me just how "purpose-driven" my times with Him had become in my daily routine. I don't know about you, but my "quiet times" are often just about checking off the daily devotion reading and making sure I've skimmed some sort of Scripture. I make sure I address the necessary prayer requests so that I'm covered for the day and my loved ones are, as well. Don't want to leave anything unprotected! And then I'm off to tackle the day on my own. The relationship aspect of just being with God goes undone. Wow.
How full is my love tank? Pretty empty. Not based on the actions of others in my life. MM is awesome at filling me up and has the most amazing heart to seek how he can do that effectively. My family is amazing at filling my love tank. But, to some degree, it comes down to me allowing them to fill it. If my MM wants to spend time with me, I actually have to let him. If my family wants to hug me, I have to let them. If my God wants to love me, I have to open myself up to Him. Sure, He can crack through, but He wants me to want Him. He wants me to choose to engage with Him. And I just don't do that very often in a real way.
But wow. When I just came to Him without an agenda this morning, it was the most love-tank-filling, overwhelming, consuming love-fest that I'd had in a long time. Sure, I tried to start it with my normal, "What do You want me to do in my quiet time today, Lord?" kind of way. But He was so quick to say, "Just be with Me." For someone who is so agenda/task oriented, that was hard at first. But it was amazing.
I won't go over the details of what we shared. That's private. ;) But I will say that He filled my love tank. Psalm 139 was part of it, as was just His voice. And it was the most enlightening way to realize just how much I need this kind of quality time with my Father. Thank You, Lord, for showing me. Thank You for wanting to engage with me on this level. Thank You for being my Lord, my Friend, my Father.
So, I'll ask you today. . . How's your love tank? If it's a little empty, I totally encourage you to strategically carve out just TIME with God. Time just to sit with Him and let Him pour His love into you. Oh my goodness do you/me/we all need it. Only through these times can we really receive just how much He loves us JUST AS WE ARE. We don't have to do anything, be anything, fix anything. We can just know and believe that our Father loves us unconditionally and considers us His beloved children.
Rest in that truth today and let Him speak it to you. He LOVES you. . . just as you are.
Hugs, friends!
- Jill
Monday, October 10, 2011
Monday, October 3, 2011
Get real.
Okay, so yesterday, because I couldn't sit still long enough to just watch the Chiefs game, I decided to busy myself in the kitchen doing one of my favorite activities: baking! It was a perfect fall day for it, so I just grabbed the big Betty Crocker cookbook, looked up a recipe based on ingredients I had on hand, and started cookin'! What came out was the most beautiful, homemade vanilla cream pie I'd ever seen. :) And all from scratch! Crust, filling and meringue. All homemade! :) :) SOOO awesome!
I wanted to challenge myself a little, and I didn't want to take any shortcuts or use any premade junk. I wanted something REAL--something like grandma used to make. So, that's what came out. haha! Funny thing was that I didn't realize it would have to cool for, like, ever, so I can't try it until tonight. I'll have to let you know later if it tastes good. But I did cut into it this morning to check and see what it looked like inside, and it looks AMAZING! :)
Real. . . This word has been playing on my heartstrings since Saturday. I took a whirlwind trip back to my hometown to participate in our library's 90th anniversary party (thank you, ladies, for the wonderful event!!) and sign some books, and, in the process, I had a LOT of think time in the car.
It was funny. For most of the six hours, I tried to find things that would occupy my mind or keep me entertained. Sports talk radio, football games, NPR, classical music, sermons, country music, and, of course, worship CDs. All good things. But none of them kept me permanently entertained. I'd get bored of them eventually and have to find something else to keep my attention.
Eventually, I began to get frustrated. Why wouldn't anything keep my mind engaged? Why wasn't I able to find something that would just keep me completely satisfied the whole time? Why did I have to constantly keep switching around in order to keep things fresh or find new fulfillment?
This is where the Lord spoke. Eventually, I just shut everything off. Radio off. CDs off. Silence. Just me and the Lord. "God, what do You want me to do? What do You want me to listen to? What on earth will make this ride more enjoyable?"
"Me."
Oh.
"Just me."
Um, wow. Okay.
It was like so many lights went on. Why couldn't I keep satisfied? Because it was all just temporary entertainment. It wasn't Christ. It wasn't God. It was just earthly stuff that wasn't meant to provide lasting fulfillment. I would wear out on each different thing because it couldn't provide the longterm satisfaction I was looking for. Only God can do that. Only in my relationship with Him am I able to be completely filled and at peace. That's it! It's the only thing that has lasting value.
After that, I started looking at my life and seeing how this played into so many other areas. I do this all the time. I look to other things to find fulfillment and then get disappointed or frustrated when they don't live up to expectations. I'll keep seeking after them and expecting them to fulfill me, only to find that I have to keep seeking after more of it if I want to keep being satisfied. When I look to these outside sources, I always need more of them. They never are enough. They're not real.
Let's put it into an example. I can run and run and run and run and run (and I have done this), but I will never be fulfilled by running. There will always be a greater distance, a faster time, another race. And I'll always want more.
Same thing with money. I can earn and earn and earn and earn and earn (and I have NOT done this), but there will always be a bigger house, better car, more luxurious vacation. It will never be enough.
These things aren't real. They are substitutes for the only REAL thing we can have: a relationship with God the Father through Jesus Christ. That is the absolute ONLY thing that can satisfy our souls.
My quiet times with the Lord are when I experience this the most. It's during those moments that I realize, "Oh, hey. This is real. This is where I am fulfilled. This is authentic. Nothing else today has been able to satisfy me. Jesus, You can."
It's a great day when we realize that whatever we are seeking here on earth won't ever meet our needs. When we realize that, we will truly understand just how precious our relationship with the Lord truly is. Intimacy with Him is the only thing that can touch the places in our hearts that are crying out for lasting love and peace. Other things may work for brief amounts of time, but they will never keep us satisfied forever. But what they can't do, Jesus can. And He will.
Somehow I was going to tie in an analogy using the realness of Jesus by using the realness of my pie, but it just doesn't seem appropriate anymore. I was all about using REAL ingredients instead of shortcut premade stuff, but even my homemade vanilla cream pie seems pretty insignificant after examining the eternal fulfillment of Christ. haha! :) He's way better than the pie! No matter how good it is, it won't fill me up forever! :) I'll still have to eat again. And I'll probably still want another piece after the first is gone.
But here's the thing: Once we understand that Christ is what we really want, we can be free to enjoy everything temporary as the blessings that they are! When we release them from the expectations of fulfilling us, they become sources of joy that He gives us as blessings! I can enjoy a piece of pie knowing that it won't keep me satisfied forever. It wasn't meant to. But I can enjoy the serving and thank Him for the experience.
Anyone else hungry? haha! Hope you have a great Monday, friends, knowing that the Lord of all creation loves you and wants to develop an eternally fulfilling relationship with you. I hope you let Him!
Big hugs!
- Jill
I wanted to challenge myself a little, and I didn't want to take any shortcuts or use any premade junk. I wanted something REAL--something like grandma used to make. So, that's what came out. haha! Funny thing was that I didn't realize it would have to cool for, like, ever, so I can't try it until tonight. I'll have to let you know later if it tastes good. But I did cut into it this morning to check and see what it looked like inside, and it looks AMAZING! :)
Real. . . This word has been playing on my heartstrings since Saturday. I took a whirlwind trip back to my hometown to participate in our library's 90th anniversary party (thank you, ladies, for the wonderful event!!) and sign some books, and, in the process, I had a LOT of think time in the car.
It was funny. For most of the six hours, I tried to find things that would occupy my mind or keep me entertained. Sports talk radio, football games, NPR, classical music, sermons, country music, and, of course, worship CDs. All good things. But none of them kept me permanently entertained. I'd get bored of them eventually and have to find something else to keep my attention.
Eventually, I began to get frustrated. Why wouldn't anything keep my mind engaged? Why wasn't I able to find something that would just keep me completely satisfied the whole time? Why did I have to constantly keep switching around in order to keep things fresh or find new fulfillment?
This is where the Lord spoke. Eventually, I just shut everything off. Radio off. CDs off. Silence. Just me and the Lord. "God, what do You want me to do? What do You want me to listen to? What on earth will make this ride more enjoyable?"
"Me."
Oh.
"Just me."
Um, wow. Okay.
It was like so many lights went on. Why couldn't I keep satisfied? Because it was all just temporary entertainment. It wasn't Christ. It wasn't God. It was just earthly stuff that wasn't meant to provide lasting fulfillment. I would wear out on each different thing because it couldn't provide the longterm satisfaction I was looking for. Only God can do that. Only in my relationship with Him am I able to be completely filled and at peace. That's it! It's the only thing that has lasting value.
After that, I started looking at my life and seeing how this played into so many other areas. I do this all the time. I look to other things to find fulfillment and then get disappointed or frustrated when they don't live up to expectations. I'll keep seeking after them and expecting them to fulfill me, only to find that I have to keep seeking after more of it if I want to keep being satisfied. When I look to these outside sources, I always need more of them. They never are enough. They're not real.
Let's put it into an example. I can run and run and run and run and run (and I have done this), but I will never be fulfilled by running. There will always be a greater distance, a faster time, another race. And I'll always want more.
Same thing with money. I can earn and earn and earn and earn and earn (and I have NOT done this), but there will always be a bigger house, better car, more luxurious vacation. It will never be enough.
These things aren't real. They are substitutes for the only REAL thing we can have: a relationship with God the Father through Jesus Christ. That is the absolute ONLY thing that can satisfy our souls.
My quiet times with the Lord are when I experience this the most. It's during those moments that I realize, "Oh, hey. This is real. This is where I am fulfilled. This is authentic. Nothing else today has been able to satisfy me. Jesus, You can."
It's a great day when we realize that whatever we are seeking here on earth won't ever meet our needs. When we realize that, we will truly understand just how precious our relationship with the Lord truly is. Intimacy with Him is the only thing that can touch the places in our hearts that are crying out for lasting love and peace. Other things may work for brief amounts of time, but they will never keep us satisfied forever. But what they can't do, Jesus can. And He will.
Somehow I was going to tie in an analogy using the realness of Jesus by using the realness of my pie, but it just doesn't seem appropriate anymore. I was all about using REAL ingredients instead of shortcut premade stuff, but even my homemade vanilla cream pie seems pretty insignificant after examining the eternal fulfillment of Christ. haha! :) He's way better than the pie! No matter how good it is, it won't fill me up forever! :) I'll still have to eat again. And I'll probably still want another piece after the first is gone.
But here's the thing: Once we understand that Christ is what we really want, we can be free to enjoy everything temporary as the blessings that they are! When we release them from the expectations of fulfilling us, they become sources of joy that He gives us as blessings! I can enjoy a piece of pie knowing that it won't keep me satisfied forever. It wasn't meant to. But I can enjoy the serving and thank Him for the experience.
Anyone else hungry? haha! Hope you have a great Monday, friends, knowing that the Lord of all creation loves you and wants to develop an eternally fulfilling relationship with you. I hope you let Him!
Big hugs!
- Jill
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