Perfect, perfect, perfect run this morning. Days like today make me forget about all the bad ones and remember the reasons why running is awesome. Perfect temperature (around 50), little wind, light traffic, rested legs, and a great revelation from the Lord. :) 6.3 miles of joy. :)
So, my revelation...I think the Lord has revealed a major lie I've been believing. If you've been following the blog throughout this process, you have seen about a BILLION injuries come up. There has been a pulled adductor, plantar fascitis, knee issues, blisters, ligament strains and hamstring problems. While none of them has sidelined me from physical training, they've all produced their own mental "training," if you will.
But here's the thing. Somehow, whenever I get hurt, I always think that God is punishing me for running. I think it stems from several sources that I won't get into, but I am starting to see how the enemy pits me against God when I start to think this way. I still need to run, so I pull back from God because I think He's mad at me for running and trying to punish me by injuring me. Because running has been an idol of mine in the past, I've always been a little anxious that God will take it away from me like He did last year.
Does that make sense? Because of the idolatry in the past, I'm always worried that it will be taken away again to keep it from becoming a "god" in my life. And that's where the enemy starts to play tricks on my mind when it comes to injuries. Here's what I hear: "Jill, you're cheating on God by running. He doesn't want you to run. He's trying to take this from you."
So, what do I do? I become like Adam and Eve and try to hide from God. "Don't look, God. I'm running, and I don't think You want me to."
Liar! I call it out, now! :)
What if each of these injuries has been an opportunity, instead, for God to demonstrate His healing power? What if they are a way to help me rely on Him instead of myself? What if, though each of these obstacles, God is demonstrating His faithfulness and love? What if He really will keep His promises to see this through to completion? I believe those now. I see it now. I see it through the fact that He planned my off day for the day when my hamstring would need a day to heal. I see it in the fact that my adductor strain healed up without any significant time off. I see it in the fact that He rescued me with my orthodics several weeks back, which has helped the pain in the right ligament. I see it in the way He provided flat training ground when I couldn't take hills. I see it in the way He put my athletic trainer friend in my path when I was convinced I had a stress fracture. HE IS FAITHFUL!!! :)
Instead of hiding from God when I'm hurt, I need to run toward Him! He's the One who has held me together. He is carrying me through! Without Him, I really can't run a single step! God, forgive me for believing such a lie. Help me to see You for who You are--a God who is all-powerful and all-loving. The God who heals me. :) Thank You, Jesus. Please keep Your hand on me, Lord. I trust You to see this through to completion, obstacles and all. I give them all to You! :) In the name of Jesus I pray. Amen. :)
-For healing on the right hamstring, right foot and left blisters.
-For protection over the left knee.
-For our troops, especially for those who are experiencing marriage problems as a result of war.
-For Military Ministry and their continued provision.
-For the 10-miles of speed work tomorrow.
-For sleep tonight.
Thanks so much, team!! :) Love y'all!