I just don't know, guys. I just don't know. I can't walk at the moment. Running seems pretty out of the question. I just don't know.
I don't want discouragement to really get a foothold, so I'm sitting here just trying to find the right train of thought to settle on.
Today, doing a routine treadmill recovery run, pretty much all the wheels came off. Remember that blister that was forming on the left foot? It burst in the middle of the run. I had to stop and take out the orthodics. Remember that foot pain in the right arch? It's not tendonitis. I've had tendonitis. This is either a stress fracture or a bone bruise. Either way, after I took out the orthodics, the run was going fine. And then I had some sharp pain shooting up from my right foot. Um, I'm pretty sure that's not good.
It was certainly an interesting sight to watch me try and walk when I took my shoes off back at my apartment. I can't step on the left foot because of the ginormous gaping hole in the middle of it's sole. I can't walk normally on my right foot because it hurts. I look like I'm 95.
What I know to be true: God is faithful. What I know to be true: God sees the big picture. What I know to be true: that I can trust Him. What I know to be true: that He loves me.
What I don't know: Whether or not I'll be able to finish this training. What I don't know: How to go about this week without letting these injuries be a distraction. What I don't know: How not to cry right now. I'm really sad and frustrated. Prayers would be appreciated.
If God has different plans that don't include running in the Boston Marathon, then that's gotta be okay. It has to be part of His plan. I don't like it, but I'll trust Him with it. If He does have plans for me to be able to run this race, then something is going to have to change.
The page in my prayer journal that I use during my morning quiet times had this verse on it today, so I'm going to be mulling it over and asking Him to reveal more truth to me today. Maybe this is to inspire hope in my soul. 1 Peter 5:9-10 (The Message): "To keep a firm grip on the faith...It won't be long before this generous God who has great plans for us in Christ...will have you put together and on your feet for good."
I don't believe in coinscidences, so I'm going to hold to that verse and ask God to put me back together and on my feet for good. If you'd join me in that prayer, that would be amazing.
Well, friends, I'm off to an FCA leadership retreat until Thursday. We don't have a single bit of internet access there, so I may have to recruit my mom to blog for me. They'll be short, but at least you'll hear the workouts and updates. And, you can be sure, I'll have a lot to say when I get back. :)
-For our troops and their families to be blessed with God's love and strength.
-For Military Ministry
-For healing on my left blister.
-For healing on my right foot.
-For peace of mind.
-For the workouts on the retreat (not much of anywhere to run).
Ciao, friends! May we all be joyful in hope, patient in affliction and faithful in prayer today.